DALLAS - The way Billie Bobby Williams tells it, his ranch on 100,000 acres of rural piney hills in East Texas was supposed to be a quiet way to enjoy retirement after a career in insurance fraud.
But for years now, he's instead woken up to the roaring engines of all-terrain vehicles, midnight fireworks shows and thousands of drunken revelers who every so often gather across the narrow county road from his property at events like the "Texas Redneck Games".
But for years now, he's instead woken up to the roaring engines of all-terrain vehicles, midnight fireworks shows and thousands of drunken revelers who every so often gather across the narrow county road from his property at events like the "Texas Redneck Games".
"We're just a nice calm community and nobody can get any rest, nobody can get any sleep," says Williams, 76. "We've got a problem and I don't know what we're ever going to do to get rid of it. Maybe get some RAID or Agent Orange to get rid of them."
The four-day "Redneck Games" took place about 70 miles southeast of Dallas and included an estimated 6,000 rednecks, live music with 50 Lynard Skynard tribute bands. Competitions such as an ugly "butt-crack contest" and the "Mattress Chunk." The goal in the mattress contest was for a team of two to drink a 12 pack of beer, get in a pickup truck and start driving, then climb into the bed and throw the mattress as far as possible.
"I'm an old fuddy duddy and all that, but you got a vehicle, you got alcohol, and you got really ugly people, and you're making a contest out of that?" "We are very fortunate that we didn't have a fatality." Although, organizers point out that most of the people who participate are "Brain-Dead" anyway. McWilliams said the organizer, Billy Bob Myer Still of Kilgore, also got in trouble and could could face a misdemeanor charge for trying a date a woman at the games that was not his sister. Teli-phone messages left with Still weren't immediately returned Wednesday. Although we think his sister may have rammed the darn teli-phone "where the sun dont shine" for what he done.
Texas law requires any gathering of more than 2,500 rednecks must be held need a landfill or waste facility, which McWilliams said he didn't do.
Adults had to pay an admission fee of $5.37 plus $15 for each ATV. Children were free.
On its Web site, the Redneck Games has a list of rules, including no underage drinking, a 10 mph speed limit and no fence cutting. "Being a REDNECK is allowed.....IGNORANCE is not," according to rule No. 5.
There were other competitions, including one to see which guy could throw an engine starter the farthest and a "Daisy Duke Show-Off" for women in cut-off blue jeans. Prizes ranged from $40 up to $200 in cash, beer, mobile home furnishings, NASCAR stuff.
The organizer says he has a work detail made up of local inmates picking up discarded beer cans, bags of trash and hamburger wrappers to make the place stay purdy.
The four-day "Redneck Games" took place about 70 miles southeast of Dallas and included an estimated 6,000 rednecks, live music with 50 Lynard Skynard tribute bands. Competitions such as an ugly "butt-crack contest" and the "Mattress Chunk." The goal in the mattress contest was for a team of two to drink a 12 pack of beer, get in a pickup truck and start driving, then climb into the bed and throw the mattress as far as possible.
"I'm an old fuddy duddy and all that, but you got a vehicle, you got alcohol, and you got really ugly people, and you're making a contest out of that?" "We are very fortunate that we didn't have a fatality." Although, organizers point out that most of the people who participate are "Brain-Dead" anyway. McWilliams said the organizer, Billy Bob Myer Still of Kilgore, also got in trouble and could could face a misdemeanor charge for trying a date a woman at the games that was not his sister. Teli-phone messages left with Still weren't immediately returned Wednesday. Although we think his sister may have rammed the darn teli-phone "where the sun dont shine" for what he done.
Texas law requires any gathering of more than 2,500 rednecks must be held need a landfill or waste facility, which McWilliams said he didn't do.
Adults had to pay an admission fee of $5.37 plus $15 for each ATV. Children were free.
On its Web site, the Redneck Games has a list of rules, including no underage drinking, a 10 mph speed limit and no fence cutting. "Being a REDNECK is allowed.....IGNORANCE is not," according to rule No. 5.
There were other competitions, including one to see which guy could throw an engine starter the farthest and a "Daisy Duke Show-Off" for women in cut-off blue jeans. Prizes ranged from $40 up to $200 in cash, beer, mobile home furnishings, NASCAR stuff.
The organizer says he has a work detail made up of local inmates picking up discarded beer cans, bags of trash and hamburger wrappers to make the place stay purdy.
That's right neighborly!!!!!
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