To: Donald Trump, CEO, The Trump Organization
From: Human Resources
Subject: The Glass Ceiling

Mr. Trump, for the last time, "The Glass Ceiling" is a metaphor for our company's systematic discrimination against the upward progress of women. We do not have, nor plan to build, an actual ceiling made of glass. In addition to posing a slew of architectural problems, it would require relocating all women to a separate floor.

Besides, if the women were on a different floor, it would take longer to be brought coffee. And beyond of our constant watch, they might stage group readings of The Vagina Monologues and converge all their menstrual cycles.

We are, however, looking into the construction of a glass floor and mandatory skirt policy for dames.